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^ Once met a potato in a grocery store in France, now he wants to marry it
^ He has performed numerous marriage ceremonies between humans and starchy root vegetables.
^ Doesn't believe in marriage.
^ He was queried as to whether or not he believes he'd marry the first woman who would have him and he said, "I do."
^ Once let his beard out of the window in Rapunzel style, allowing his first love to sneak up his bedroom, while his parents thought he was playing video games
^ Often confuses video games with sex anyway, so he can't really tell the difference, what with all the up, down, left, right, A, B, etc.
^ He won't buy a new video game if there isn't an acceptable nude mod for it.
^ He won't buy a new video game if he can't play it nude in the store.
^ He knows something that I do nor apparently. Do they really have places like that, or were you just going for the shock value?
^ Studied a legend that speaks of a mythical real-life DLC called "Clothes Add-on", but still hasn't stumbled upon tangible evidence of its existence
Studied himself in archeology school.
Is the subject of a *TOP SECRET* biological experiment...
^ Conducted the experiment with Val Kilmer.
^ He has read most of the dissertations that I have written for my Ph.D.s.
^ Most of the papers he published during his Ph.D.s are of Hollywood quality