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General discussion (archive)Gaspe girl commits suicide following years of bullying(84 posts)(84 posts)
(84 posts)
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This is my favourite topic
Posted December 01, 2011
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Kabuto: ....
And of course since the bullies have far easier access to the FB page for her little league team (or whatever) they can mess with her by proxy even when she does disconnected things.

I've seen bullies try and force other kids to "not be friends" with their current bullying target. Some kids are too weak to refuse (not really a big failing for a kid when they comply with that, not all of them will have developed a spine or a thick skin yet).
Post edited December 01, 2011 by orcishgamer
Posted December 01, 2011
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orcishgamer: Bullying could cause all those conditions (i.e. symptoms) in a co morbid fashion and still remain the root cause. Sure not everyone's pre-wired to be so easy to push over the edge but neither is everyone pre-wired to become an alcoholic really easily either.

Besides, it's hard to account for mitigating factors from the bullying, just having that one, nerdy friend that no one else likes either might be enough to "save" some kids. Having a greater sense of belonging due to a sibling at home could also do so. It doesn't necessarily have to be every case of suicide is because the parents sucked.
Right, but you're still listing other factors at play, which was my whole point.
Posted December 01, 2011
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orcishgamer: Bullying could cause all those conditions (i.e. symptoms) in a co morbid fashion and still remain the root cause. Sure not everyone's pre-wired to be so easy to push over the edge but neither is everyone pre-wired to become an alcoholic really easily either.

Besides, it's hard to account for mitigating factors from the bullying, just having that one, nerdy friend that no one else likes either might be enough to "save" some kids. Having a greater sense of belonging due to a sibling at home could also do so. It doesn't necessarily have to be every case of suicide is because the parents sucked.
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StingingVelvet: Right, but you're still listing other factors at play, which was my whole point.
No, I listed those factors as being caused by bullying, which is different from them existing somewhere deep down in the person before the bullying. If the depression and anxiety are caused by the bullying, rather than being pre-existing conditions, then their existence is incidental to the suicide and not contributory.
Posted December 01, 2011
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orcishgamer: No, I listed those factors as being caused by bullying, which is different from them existing somewhere deep down in the person before the bullying. If the depression and anxiety are caused by the bullying, rather than being pre-existing conditions, then their existence is incidental to the suicide and not contributory.
No, you mentioned predisposition and not having a support system and other such things, which are all external to the bullying.

Again, if bullying can do it by itself then the suicide numbers would be insane.
Posted December 01, 2011
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orcishgamer: No, I listed those factors as being caused by bullying, which is different from them existing somewhere deep down in the person before the bullying. If the depression and anxiety are caused by the bullying, rather than being pre-existing conditions, then their existence is incidental to the suicide and not contributory.
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StingingVelvet: No, you mentioned predisposition and not having a support system and other such things, which are all external to the bullying.

Again, if bullying can do it by itself then the suicide numbers would be insane.
Sorry, you're right, I mentioned "pre-wired" and I certainly should have made myself way more clear; but I didn't mean to imply some sort of deep, hidden defect in people who end up committing suicide for reasons like this. Almost certainly some already had issues (statistically speaking only). I'm only saying some people will have a lower tolerance for it, just as some of us are more stubborn or have any other number of variations in our character.

EDIT: Well, as for having a support system, I'd say not having as good or effective of a support system. We don't all need a perfect support system to deal with bullying anymore than we need a perfect immune system to deal with polio, imo. Let's vaccinate ourselves already:)
Post edited December 01, 2011 by orcishgamer
Posted December 01, 2011
I always hope that those that are bullied fight back in these circumstances. It's always sad when someone is driven to suicide by bullying.
Posted December 02, 2011
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GameRager: I also agree and was going to say some of the stronger stuff said by some in here but held back to be careful of what I said. Thing is, parents are also to blame in many of these cases for not taking their kids seriously enough or getting enough help quickly enough for their kids....and if they do try to do something it's usually too late and too little, sadly.

But as it's usually bad form in many countries to speak ill of the dead(even right bastards), it's also usually taboo to blame the parents of suice victims/bullying victims for any wrongdoing when the kid is dead.


It's called shutting off the internet, or not going to that website. It's not like the web holds a gun to your head forcing you to do what it wants you to.
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Kabuto: You don't get it. She doesn't have to log on. The other girls can continue to harass her and tell everybody else to do the same via facebook or twitter. It's worse than a chain letter. The Gaspe girl can no longer limit when she gets bullied. It's now 24/7 whether she's online or not.
They actually went as far as creating a facebook page to mock her death with photoshoped pictures and stuff like that. its really bad..
Posted December 02, 2011
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Post edited December 02, 2011 by GameRager
Posted December 02, 2011
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orcishgamer: It's rather presumptive to assume that's the only solution. Don't discount a possible issue just because pre-suppose the solution to said problem has to suck. The cure isn't always worse than the disease. Some are of course, but it's on us to find one that addresses the problem in the best way possible (after identifying the said problem, of course). It's disingenuous to discard a problem out of hand just because you may dislike the implications of one or more potential solutions.
I never discounted the issue. I know bullying is an issue as I was bullied as a kid as well. I was trying to point out rather that some solutions aren't the best in these kinds of situations.

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Kabuto: Guess you haven't changed a bit. Still don't read other people's posts I see. I'll give you an example. I started a program in cegep (right after high school but not quite strict like college) several years ago. The technician had a grudge against a teacher which I later found out several years later that he was just so insecure that the new guy (the teacher) would take his job so he just hated him from the start. Guess what? The technician would tell every new batch of students how terrible of a teacher he was and as a result every new batch of students hated him before the teacher even had a chance. Fast forward a few years later and the curriculum changes. New students now bypass the technician by taking this teacher in the first semester at a different location (usually first class started with this teacher second semester) and really like this exact same teacher. Why? Because the technician had no influence.

Now do you see what I mean? Instead of it being a few kids, these same few kids can now broadcast to the rest of the school and even more people can pick on her making school life even worse. She doesn't have to be online for that to happen. It's like a chain letter. It's out of her control.
I was going to leave it be but it seems you like using goading words to lure people back into conversations they had already finished discussing. :\ :)

1. I read people's posts, and while I sometimes misconstrue what people say I am pretty sure I got the "gist" of most of what you were saying and found myself to be in disagreement with what you said thus I responded in kind to that effect....albeit not clearly enough I guess.

2. What I meant last reply was that the choice for her herself to avoid such sites and bad words/etc was in her control. Of course others might see those words and believe such about her but that's always out of someone's control. You can't and shouldn't be allowed to dictate what others can say about you online or control other people's lives in such a fashion, unless it's something like others are slandering you(as an adult) and risking you your career or reputation(which there are laws against btw already.).

If people dislike you because of something they heard or read then try and inform them of the truth and make friends with them....turn the situation around in your favor. If it doesn't work because those others are too gullible with what they believe and too stubborn to learn the truth, then those people probably weren't worthy of your friendship to begin with if they're so easily led astray by anyone who utter a single word.
Post edited December 02, 2011 by GameRager
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General discussion (archive)Gaspe girl commits suicide following years of bullying(84 posts)(84 posts)
(84 posts)