Yeah I agree with you. Kids get out of line. Most of them do, at one point or another. It's what kids do. And being a teenager is a lot more stressful than adults give kids credit for. Sure, it's stress from trivial bullshit, but if you get that wrong, your life becomes hell (not due to your parents, due to your peers). She shouldn't have posted that bullshit, but he simply did not resolve this in any acceptable manner whatsoever.

I'm not sure, but it's possible. Demanding that a "cleaning lady" does jobs is out of line in any case as long as she doesn't pay for said cleaning lady herself, or at least contributes to it.

The problem is that once the situation has worsened to a point as the one we see in the video, the above assessment - as justified as it may be - is unlikely to solve the problem. The daughter seems unwilling to do basic chores, the dad tries to force her by punishing her if she doesn't do them. Increasing the punishment will only worsen the situation. Offering her rewards for "correct" behavior is, however, likely to improve it.

I know that that feels somewhat awkward because, in a way, it rewards the kid for not having done things that should go without saying. (It's especially awkward when there are siblings around who didn't have these problems, but that's usually solvable too.) But it's very often the best solution to get back to a working relationship, upon which the family can build later.

You can of course say "the kid is just a brat" - it might be justified (depending on the assumptions we make), but it won't do anything to improve the situation. (Plus, the brattiness might have roots in earlier parenting mistakes, which would increase the dad's responsibility for finding a working solution.)

Well, I kind of agree that she could learn multiple things from the current lesson. These include:

- It's okay to fight personal battles in public as long as you have better arguments
- It's okay to destroy useful property to make a dramatic point
- It's okay to publicly deface a family member if it's done in retaliation
- It's okay to snoop into your kid's facebook account even if it specifically blocked you out of it

Personally, I'm not sure if I would _want_ my kids to learn specifically _these_ lessons ... ;)

But to be honest, I doubt that the dad actually thought that far. I don't think he actually has a coherent plan about what he wants to achieve with that video and how it's supposed to have that effect. To me, he seems very ... helpless. Nice guy, deeply disappointed, angry, not able to deal with it, basically he's at the end of his tether and can't come up with a better solution than this video. If he had actually thought this through, then he might have arrived at the conclusion that there are much better ways ways to handle the situation.

If something ticks you off, take out your gun and start shooting. That's the lesson I would get from this.

I don't get the deface part. I think you mean debase maybe? Or I could be wrong
Personally I don't think he said anything about his daughter that could be considered humiliating for her. Unless being told that you need to do your chores or get a job is considered humiliating

He said, she said...

But he's the guy with the gun.

I think the father was justified in his anger, although I'm more of a fan keeping family issues within the family. But then again, she was the one who started it. When will people learn this: Do not post anything online that you wouldn't want to see on the evening news. Or at the very least, not under your real name or known username--do it under an alias if you really have to (which you don't).

Shooting the laptop, such a waste. I agree, charity would have been better, there are other people who could use a nice laptop. Or dropping it off at Goodwill after reformatting it.

OTOH, shooting the laptop is much cooler.

Ah yes, sorry. Confused it with something else, thanks for the correction.
The daughter would probably disagree, and she's the one supposed to learn something from the video, so it's her perspective that matters when contemplating things that she might learn. But I don't insist on "debase" either, feel free to replace it with a different word if you feel that it's too strong. My point was to question the way in which the dad's behavior is supposed to be a good role model for the behavior that he wants his daughter to show, this is independent of vocabulary details imho.

Btw, I noticed I didn't answer your earlier question (why I think that the laptop wasn't already a reward): I'm pretty sure about that since the dad stresses several times that it's nice/kind of him to spend the time and money to upgrade the laptop. This upgrade was not part of a deal between him and the kid. If it were, then he could have simply canceled the deal. I think one of the reasons for his deep disappointment may be that he was just doing something nice for his kid, and then discovered that letter on her facebook wall.

She is 15, father ain't. When your kid does stupid shit you don't humiliate her by showing your shit to the world.
And shooting a laptop because the kid threw a tantrum? That will show her proper manners!
And lastly, FUCK YEAH AMERICA!

Man of the fucking year! He is my hero!

He overreacted a bit. Up until the shooting of the laptop all was well, though I'm not sure he should have posted it on the internet, might have been better to just have talked to her in private. Yeah, she started it, but she's a kid and he's and adult and he should have tried to be the bigger person.
Shooting the laptop was stupid. Should have given it away or tried to sold it, at least then someone could use it.

How much time past between him seeing the post and uploading the video? Didn't he mention putting the software on the laptop just the other day? If so, sounds like he really didn't think this through. Wonder if he'll end up regretting it.

Get used to it, we are going to see this happening more and more, especially since a new generation of parents are coming in that is a lot more tech savvy. Nothing is safe from the internet.

I sort of agree with this. I'm stressed from a physiological sleep disorder, my family structure, school, and work. I fully support the father for his actions because my dad would have probably done something similar. Did he over react a tad bit? Yes, but it was fucking funny to watch. :D

He said " I just spent six hours yesterday upgrading your computer yesterday, and spent $130 on it. And today I find on facebook blah blah". Her post was obviously angry about having to do chores. Since she posted it the day after he fixed her laptop , it could be that wanted her to do chores afterwards as a way of earning it. Or as he put it with the cleaning lady "exchanging of services". That was the whole point of him bringing up the time and money spent . He was saying " you want me to fix your computer and spend $130 on it? OK well you're gonna have to earn it by doing chores". That's the way i saw it anyway. He wasn't saying it to talk about what a nice guy he was

Tech savvy is only relevant that we get to see this. He is shooting a goddamn laptop fucks sake, it's not normal. He is more of a drama queen than his daughter is. At least she didn't trash the bed sheets or the counter top.

Also, FUCK YAH AMERCA!