Read the Q&A; he said (and she admitted) that every time he just took away something from her she improved her attitude, waited to get it back and then after some time reverted to her idiotic behavior.

I once believed the way you do and your very basics are true: people are different, we are born with a certain character and twins raised the same way can still have very different personalities.

BUT.

Let me draw you an analogy. I have two identical laptops. Both are used for the same kind of work yet the DVD drive of one is having trouble reading CD-Rs but the other is fine. What you suggest, is that there's no way to fix this one laptop because, well, one is flawed and the other is not! Surely you can just write it down to how they are manufactured and even if you treat the laptops the same way, one will still have a bad DVD drive and the other doesn't. But how about using a USB drive instead for the other one? Why not make a little effort and make it so the other laptop doesn't NEED the faulty DVD drive?

To bring it back to people: everyone is different, but people all share a common ground and most people respond well when you put effort into it. I've seen kids that were real brats grow up to be the kindest guys because their parents were loving and patient and they had the right friends. Most young people are not "flawed" to a point where they can't be twisted back into shape - especially not at that age.

So yes, you're wrong because you don't seem to understand that there's basic behaviour that underlies it all. Even if the girl is stubborn, it's far from impossible to still make her respect you. But clearly this father refuses to take that extra step. He'd rather fix her laptop and bitch about the cost than fix his relationship with her.

EDIT: and yes, some people are beyond redemption - some people are born with such a warped personality that they're impossible to redeem but these are a very very very small minority

" Read the Q&A; he said (and she admitted) that every time he just took away something from her she improved her attitude, waited to get it back and then after some time reverted to her idiotic behavior."

Well, if she has shown that she can't learn from her actions, fine, "permanently" take something away, sell it, give it away, but I still say destroying it is just bad form.

He's a zero tolerance kind of guy. Probably like his dad was. I know one thing about possible upbringing issues: If a father hits his son, then his son will probably do the same to his child. Unless of course he escaped the loop, and tries his own method. Now, any one of the methods will probably produce expected results, but sometimes there are extremes - like a kid from a completely dysfunctional family growing up to become a caring and normal father. Or his child, coming from a family where they all talked about their issues and in fact were a completely fine family, and then getting jailed for rape and murder. Doesn't happen frequently, but it does.

Now there's one thing you need to understand: I am completely against violence in the family. I'd also rather see that guy try to solve this some other way, probably with constructive dialogue. But we're not the judge here - we don't know what's actually going on in the family. What if he hits his daughter? What if she likes to kill animals when no one is looking. What if his wife is a drunk. Or they are a perfectly normal family, and we just witnessed some radical point in their life? This could just blow over in a week... There are around seven billion people on this planet, and you can't standardise everyone into do's and dont's. The equation is infinitely more complicated.

To really make a point you cannot afford the luxury of compromise.

I cannot. If I was able to provide a coherent explanation of this single issue, I'd have a doctorate material at my hands, ready to be published.

As I said - there can be people out there who actually believe that, even if you're not among them yourself. The whole idea behind trying to raise a child by forcing them to do some things and forbidding others is based on the "obedience is intelligence" assumption commonly applied to dogs (as in: a "smart" dog is the one you can easily teach tricks). It's quite obvious that the only way a child can grow up to be a reasonable adult is through having a mind of its own, thinking instead of blindly obeying.

But I also disagree with your statement on people beings slaves to their brains, though I find a glimmer of hope in the use of "most" instead of "all".
The value I find most precious in all of universe is "freedom" or "liberty". To assume that the world itself enslaves me and provides with merely an elaborate illusion of freedom would be "heresy". Neither I nor anyone else can prove this wrong, just as it is impossible to conclusively prove it right.
Call it faith - I believe we aren't set on rails, I believe things can be different than they will be. I believe in choice and possibility.

But that's a bit offtopic. I also believe in mercy and humility, as I've already stated, so I think this should've been solved by a calm conversation. Waging a war against a child isn't going to accomplish anything, other than lead even deeper in the spiral of mutual hatred.
Coercion begets rebellion.

Edit: Wow, look what Google gave me...

1. You have a God complex.
2. You still have a God complex, despite the realisation that just set in on the matter that you have a God complex. You simply observed the point, and decided I was mistaken, because you are in fact God.
3. Who the hell numbers the points in their posts?!!
4. Do you think we can't count, perhaps losing track of what we're reading because of it's sheer awesomeness?
5. Perhaps you have an aversion to paragraphs, which is the traditional way to segregate content that is not directly related.
6. In fact numbering your posts is so arrogant that it has forced me to waste time telling someone who thinks they are God, that they are abusing capital letters (when we're able to use bold text), and basically placing themselves as better than us.
8. Screw counting. I'm redefining numbers my way, because I'm God, and you're an imposter. From now on 8 follows 6.

Wow, what an intelligent way to answer...
How about you start answering to him with real arguments?

I'm not arguing with him. That's the reason for the lack of arguments. I am not disputing his content, I am disputing his formatting.

I don't understand your complaints in any of these. All of this because of numbered points instead of paragraphs? The difference is harmless

I'm not sure of anything with regards to this situation. What I am sure of is that the whole "if you do a good job parenting your kid will turn out fine" rhetoric is pretty much idealistic bullshit. I see why you believe it, hell, I see why anyone without kids would believe it, it just happens to be wrong.

Yes, you can get parents that do a fine job, the kid goes off the deep end when they hit puberty and they literally have no clue how to deal with it. All bets are off as to the "proper" way to handle it because none of the proper ways achieve either jack nor shit.

No one has a problem with you having an opinion on parenting, we're simply pointing out that we think your opinion is idealistic and pretty much doesn't really work on most kids. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, I didn't really like it when I found out the hard way either.

Huh.. I've made two posts and neither seem to be showing up. If they DO show up, could someone delete one of them? They were the same thing both times, bar a few changes where I couldn't remember what I'd added.

EDIT: Well, THIS post appeared, so I'll try editing it to include what I'd originally posted.

I'm gonna just repost most of what I said over at the Escapist, including the person who I quoted there.

Stalydan
I'm not annoyed that he overreacted to a Facebook post. I'm not annoyed that he obviously invaded her privacy by going onto her browser, loading up Facebook and looking at her posts because he doesn't trust her. I'm annoyed that he's got such issues that he's not facing.

*large snip*

tl;dr This girl will now grow up to resent her father because he blew his fuse at something so minor rather than talking it out.

----- Huh, guess I can't italicize or quote the way I do elsewhere.---

Pretty much this a thousand times. As a child, I would see or hear about how other parents (the kind we always said shouldn't be parents) would treat their children; flying off the handle over the tiniest thing, disproportionate punishment, etc. And now people are actually advocating this kind of behaviour?

Gods, it's no wonder so many kids are turning out to be problematic. Look at what parents are doing. You don't blow up your kid's computer cause they said something on Facebook about not liking chores, or whatever it was she said. You sit down and have a long discussion about it, perhaps take her laptop away for a while.

I would hate for some of the people in this thread to become parents, because it clearly sounds like you have no idea what the hell you're doing.

The kind that's trying to illustrate exactly why she shouldn't keep posting shit like she keeps posting to Facebook. Apparently this is at least her second FB offense. He tried the traditional route the first time, this time it's object lesson time.

No, it is not harmless. However I'm not going to fight this one. I wasn't talking to you, and have no desire to pick any more fights. Perhaps The Great Vestin! will explain to his lowly subjects what the difference is. It's something you learn in debating once you get beyond the low level stuff. I'm sure he'll know.

Oh come off it. If you're responsible for the home, its upkeep, and maintaining a healthy environment therein you're perfectly within your rights to demand basic shit out of anyone who is living there. Just because a kid wants to be a special, unique butterfly doesn't give them license to be a disrespectful shit who is also such a slob they hardly ever clean up after themselves.

Few people want a trained pet as a kid. They do, however, not want to deal with loads of extra bullshit just because the kid needs to stretch their wings. Any parent in well within their rights to tell the kid to find a different, less antagonistic way to stretch their wings and it's just too damned bad if the kid doesn't like it. Parents already get down on their knees and kiss ass to make bosses and/or clients happy and bust their ass to make sure kids have what they need. To have a slob of a kid that bitches about busing their own dishes from the kitchen table or pick up their dirty clothes is probably pretty aggravating. Then to have the kid publicly spreading what amounts to lies about the family is over the top. Don't defend brats like that, best they get reined in now while there's still a chance they'll pull their heads out of their ass.